Adjusting

The past few days have been a serious adjustment. Cars, buildings, asphalt, noise, brown.....

I didn't think I'd react this way. Real life.....

I have things to get done here in Denver but am aching to get back into the wilderness. 

The desert is calling but Yellowstone has my heart. 

I thought it was silly when people would say it would be weird to drive over 35 mph. 

Once I got behind the wheel I thought 40 was 100 mph. I had to look for stoplights. I had

to look for people. I had to watch for other cars. I had to use my brake. It was a strange feeling. 

Still is. I honestly don't know if I'll get used to it. Eight months seems like an eternity. I am hoping

those months will fly by just like the winter season did. I want to be back on my skis. I want to 

feel -20 on my face. I want to see another sunset on Fern. 

But for now I'll wait. Wait out another summer so I can be where I want to be. 

Mentors

I never thought I'd have a mentor. I really didn't even know what that meant.
I'm a 42 year old 'rookie.' But I found someone who took me under their wing. She showed me the ropes. She taught me how to xc ski. She made me feel at home. She made me feel like this is where I belonged. I would say a lot of people don't get her. But for some reason she took me in. She made believe in trust again. She called me on my shit. I even call her out on hers now.
Most would say she isn't caring. But those who know her would completely disagree. She's giving and kind and compassionate.
I can't explain fully in words what she's done for me. I came here to isolate myself. I didn't really even come here to make friends. But in her I have found a best friend. Just when you aren't looking, things start to appear. It's still a long road to find myself. I couldn't have been in a better place. With a better person. She'll never quite understand what she means to me. But I'll tell her every day.