Tuesday, December 16, 2008

i started to tell everyone about you. 
but i'm afraid they will think this is just another conquest
or chasing a dream or just another girl that has come
into my life that means nothing. i will admit i've had a few of those. 
i'm telling you this (not about conquests or women i've been with)
because i trust you. because i believe in you. because i believe in us! 
because i know there is an "us" in all of this. 
i'm sure i've told them all this before. 
'there's this girl you see, and she is amazing and....'
and? and here jay goes again. 
but what makes this different? 
i'm here, you're there. 
it's been 16 years. 
how can i miss you so much? 
i rush home just to see if i get a response. 
what makes all this so different? 
am i just chasing a dream.......again? 
everything is so cloudy and confusing but 
so clear and coherent. 
i stand at the edge of this abyss. 
did i tell you i'm afraid of the edge now? 
i don't like to get near them. 
yet, here i am. 
standing here. looking over  
into something i can't see 
and something i can't make any sense from.
and i feel a calmness over my soul. 
knowing that it will be ok.